Self-Care is a Revolutionary Action

It seems self-care has taken over the mainstream and has been monetized to fit into a yoga pants, acai bowl, & green juice mold. No shame or judgement to anyone who fits this mold because to be honest to you all, this is also me. I love yoga pants and smoothies too, but I also recognize that this mold never really include women who look like me. And I know this mold comes with a price point that most don’t have.

But I think is important to look at self-care beyond wearing a face mask and once removed, you are magically free of all your problems. Real care of self can be messy and difficult because it comes with setting yourself up to come first.

This is why self-care is a revolutionary action…especially for Black Women. Since the tender beginnings of our nation’s history, Black Women were always placed as caregivers and caretakers of everyone’s woes and well-beings before her own. We have done this selflessly without much complaint but is this sustainable?

We, as women, are just gaining agency over our lives (of course, not at the same rate as our white sisters). Being vulnerable in a public way is foreign to Black Women. Vulnerability in public is a sign of weakness because our strength is our armor in a society who’s goal for a long time was tear down everything good and happy we hold true about ourselves.

I have to be strong.

I can’t afford to be weak or break.

I have to keep the family on the right track.

I can worry about myself later.

Do those statements sound familiar? When have Black Women ever been allowed to put themselves first without criticism? When have Black Women ever felt valued or listen to?

Men, Black and White, and White Women (to a larger extent than Black Women) are allowed to put themselves first unafraid of the consequences or society making them the villain. We have for so long been the pillars of strength in society. The dependable bunch.

Sometimes I believe we see the world’s problems and instead just say “F*ck it! We will take care of it!” even at the cost of our well-being & honestly, I love that we are built this way!

But…we have to learn to practice real self-care. Like setting up boundaries, taking those 30 minutes to an hour for just us, scheduling therapy appointments ( even in the middle of the day if you need it), stop toxic relationships (even if that means with family).

For so long, Black Women have been taught to endure even at the cost of our mental and physical health.

Ladies, it is time to protect yourselves and that means to protect your peace.

Protecting yourself is self-care. You are worthy.